All I Know

All I Know
Matt Wertz

I don't know how the stars hang
Or how there's night and then there's day
I don't know how you spoke into the black
And made it all obey

All I know is the bleeding in my heart
And the healing in your touch
All I know is that you gave everything
So let that be enough
'Cause it's all I know

I dont know how your love works
How you cover me in grace
I dont know how you swallow all I am
When I can't stand my taste

All I know is the bleeding in my heart
And the healing in your touch
All I know is that you gave everything
So let that be enough
'Cause it's all I know

I can't explain your mystery
But I know the answer

All I know is the bleeding in my heart
And the healing in your touch
All I know is that you gave everything
So let that be enough
'Cause it's all I know

That's all I want to know. All I want to be focused on: "that you gave everything" and I'm covered by your grace and held in your hand God. "So let that be enough," remind me how infinitely beyond sufficient you are! In a time as busy and emotional as this, you are the source of everything (anything) good and in complete control of everything. "I can't explain your mystery/But I know the answer:" the Cross.

Amos 1-4

God detests Israel's sin and is very clear that he will enact judgment because of it. Because they are his people. There is no special pardon for them simply because they are the people God has chosen. Therefore, God is still righteous and just, holding all of humanity to the same standard (his perfection).

People group: Arabs in Yemen. Poverty. No Bible. A few believers.

Do all things without grumbling...

Philippians 2: 12-15

¹²Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, ¹³for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose. ¹⁴Do everything without complaining or arguing, ¹⁵so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe...

One way to make the gospel beautiful is to "do everything without complaining or arguing." And I living this way is simply being obedient to God's word. It is cool that in this command we can see why God might call us to do this (i.e. to put the gospel on display to a lost world). It also gives us insight into the world around us. It is "crooked and depraved," and we are called to be "blameless and pure." We are called to image God's holiness rather than the lostness of the world.

So this is my challenge this week; to do all things without complaining or arguing (ESV - grumbling of questioning). The only way I can do this is with divine strength, meaning it is only possible (and entirely possible) because I've been saved by the blood of the Lamb.

One month left

There is one month left of the school year.
Four weeks of classes before finals, four weeks of being a college senior...and I could go on and on and wallow in the numerous "last things" that will fill the coming weeks.
But in the end of that train of thought, I'm still sitting here with projects and reports and readings and presentations to work on. That train of thought (self pity) is so tempting; I would be lying if I said it wasn't. BUT, I have been reminded of the greater purpose behind school: glorifying Christ and keeping my focus on the cross. No matter what I have to do or what the next few weeks hold, my purpose doesn't ultimately change because Christ doesn't change. My biggest challenge/goal is not making a grade or finishing a paper; it is loving God and honoring people (to paraphrase Piper)- being a light to those around me because of what Christ has done in saving me.
Because that is the overarching purpose in my life, I know that no matter how busy the next few weeks are, how hard the good-byes are, I am safe in the arms of my Savior.

The Greatest Cause

"The greatest cause in the world is joyfully rescuing people from hell, meeting their earthly needs, making them glad in God, and doing it with a kind, serious pleasure that makes Christ look like the Treasure he is." - Piper in Don't Waste Your Life

Joyfully rescuing
Meeting earthly needs
Making glad in God

and doing this with joy and contentment and satisfaction and so many other characteristics that fill our lives because of what Christ has done on the cross and that glorify Christ.

This is what life is about! (Haha, it's also really similar to glorify, treasure, and reach.)

"With a thankful heart"

That's the descriptive instruction for the tempo and tone of one of the songs we're playing and singing on Easter Sunday, "With a thankful heart."

There is so, so much to be thankful for. God's provision and answers to prayers has been incredibly vivid and tangible lately.

• A wonderful car for a friend, which is an answer to many months of prayers
• Overwhelming prayer support and financial provision for the trip over spring break. It has been an amazing blessing to connect with people I haven't heard from in years and to hear their encouraging words
• Time and energy to get school work done, especially this thesis that has been a two-year project
• Acceptance to just one medical school...which is close to family and potentially the best school for the type of medicine I feel called to practice
• Freedom and peace. Each day living more in light of the sufficiency of the cross and less focused on the fading "goodness" the world offers. Even when I have struggled with thoughts of worry or jealousy or bitterness, God has taught me that asking why I'm struggling is the wrong response. Instead, he calls me to cast all my cares on him. To rely on him. To rest in his arms, his plan, his provision, his sufficiency. Simply put to rest in Him. That's quite possibly the best advice I've ever been given.
  

Waiting made beautiful

From "Streams in the Desert" for today:

Thou hast made waiting beautiful; Thou has made patience divine. Thou hast taught us that the Father's will may be received just because it is His will. Thou hast revealed to us that a soul may see nothing but sorrow in the cup and yet may refuse to let it go, convinced that the eye of the Father sees further than its own.

Give me this Divine power of Thine, the power of Gethsemane. Give me the power to wait for hope itself, to look out from the casement where there are no stars. Give me the power, when the very joy that was set before me is gone, to stand unconquered amid the night, and say, "To the eye of my Father it is perhaps shining still." I shall reach the climax of strength when I have learned to wait for hope. --George Matheson

Life over the past few weeks have seemed like a holding pattern. I'm just doing what I need to do for school to get through these classes so that I can finally "land" and get on with life. But what am I missing in this perspective? Yes, there are some big details of the next chapter of life that I don't know about, but that is no reason to live differently. Even when I assume to know what the next year of my life will be like, I really have no idea nor do I have as much control as I think I do.

So what do I do now, today, this week?

Work heartily in whatever I have to do (homework, thesis writing, having coffee with friends, driving...whatever!) because I am working for Christ and not for man. Colossians 3:23-24

Trust in the Lord...

Delight yourself in him and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Commit your way to the Lord; trust him, and he will act...

Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him... Psalm 37:3-7

There is a desire in me to be married someday, and while I am waiting and trusting the Lord, part of that process is guarding place in my heart from bitterness, jealousy, anger, doubt, and especially from anything that wants to occupy that place that is not what God has intended. Bitterness and anger at a person I thought was right - block by surrender, taking every thought captive, laying each in God's hands and dwelling on his truth. The same goes for doubt, specifically replacing each doubt that God is holding out on me with the truth of his love and joy and promises for eternal life (Psalm 139, John 15, Psalm 19). Jealousy at a friend or roommate's relationship - PRAY! Pray for that person, that relationship. Prayers of thanksgiving and praise. Focus on God's grace and blessing.

And in all this, there is freedom and waiting is made beautiful.